Verbatim

Yesterday was not a great day. But it helps to have a husband who is so concerned about me. (If you were on facebook and saw his status of, "say a prayer for Alisha, she's not doing well," no - I'm not in the hospital and I wasn't diagnosed with any terminal diseases. But I thank you all for your calls, emails, text messages, and facebook posts making sure that things were ok.) So now, let's start this day off right, with one of our faves, Verbatim.

"Joan, why did Jesus die on the cross?"
"Huh?"
"I mean, He died so that we could go where?"
"Everywhere we need to go."

And sometimes Joan just says things that are slightly the wrong word or the wrong way to say it and it's just as funny:

"Momma, I need to put this money in my penny banky."

"Momma! My eggs are patching! They're breaking up with birds!"

"What did you said?"

"What clock is it?"
(what time is it)

"I love mizzerts."
(desserts)

"Can I have a ol-da-bart?"
(granola bar)

"Hi Momma. What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Oh. I thought you were breasting."

(breastfeeding)

"Momma, tell me a story about Jesus."
"Why don't you tell it to me instead."
"Well... He was there and was playing with His friends, but then,
uh-oh, He was breaking the bread..."