Verbatim (A Boogers and Poo Poo Special)

"Momma, when I get up in the morning, I'm with Papa - because Charlotte sleeps a long time. And you sleep a really long time..."
"I know. I sleep later than y'all."
"Yeah - and Papa John sleeps a really REALLY long time..."

"Hey Momma, remember when you breasted Charlotte?"

"Joan, don't eat your boogers."
"But I like them."
"You like them? But what do they taste like?"
"Bugs, I think..."
"That's gross. Don't eat them."
"But please?!"

"When me and Charlotte were a baby in your tummy, we were angels and then we fell out and then we grew up. Did you know that?"

"Joan, don't wipe your face on your blanket. Use a napkin."
"But I didn't have any sugar on my hands or anything..."
"It doesn't matter. Your getting it dirty and now we have to wash it."
"But I was just loving it..."(the blanket)

"When my boogers are soft, I want a tissue. But if they're hard, I just eat them."

"Momma, whatcha making?"

"Mashed potatoes."
"I don't like those."

"I know. But you know that's what's in a french fry, right?"
"No... french fries are made out of corn."

"No, honey - potatoes."
"But really it's corn. I know."

"Momma, I smell bacon coming out of my nose."

"I don't like to poo poo sometimes. I don't like to push it out. That's because I'm shy."