Why I sew.

Ever since I was young, I've always needed a creative outlet: singing, playing guitar, painting, crafting, writing, and taking photos. Sewing is just an extension of that.

But when I was talking to Jude recently about how much I love sewing, I got to over-analyzing (something I'm also really great at...) and I discovered some pretty deep stuff.

If you're really close to me, you might describe me as a pessimist. I may disguise it with humor and sarcasm, but the message is the same - everything's falling a part, there's no use - no hope. It is what it is and I'm aggravated by it. I'm impatient and want results as soon as possible. I also get easily overwhelmed with lots of information and I'd rather someone else just tell me what to do to get it right.

But when I sew, I become a different person, a better version of Alisha. 

Suddenly, I see the possibilities in things and I'm hopeful. I picture what they can be transformed into. An old holy t-shirt is now an adorable ruffle at the bottom of a dress. Everything can be saved and made into something beautiful. I am patient and calm in the midst of a challenge, a problem, or a mistake. I don't doubt myself the way I would in real life.

And even though I occasionally scan the internet for inspirations and tutorials, most of the stuff I do just comes to me. Sometimes, though, when I do find a tutorial that I want to do, I don't even read their directions - I just start and keep trying until it works. I trust that I'll figure it out on my own.

Let's be honest, I'll probably never be as ecofriendly as most of my friends here - they're pretty intense about their organic farming, naturally medicating, personal chicken-coop owning, and responsible consuming. But repurposing stuff makes me feel like I'm doing my part, too (which happens to be way easier than farming, I hear).

And I have to say, I enjoy the recognition. I like knowing that what I've done is tangibly valuable and desired by others. No one is raving about the mac 'n cheese with carrot puree I just made (especially not Joan) but people dig the owls. And they'll buy them.

So now, when filling out a silly questionnaire, I can finally answer "yes," I have a hobby: sewing. But it's so much more than that.